Mubende, engagement ceremony

This weekend was amazing! Two of the other interns and I went with our "boss" to a traditional engagement ceremony in Mubende, which is about 2 hours outside of Kampala. The drive over was beautiful, and I was glad I got to see more of what Uganda looks like, especially in places where there is less clay and dirt and lots of pretty trees! The only not so fun, but still interesting part of our ride over to Mubende was peeing in the bush on the side of the road! I suppose it was a good experience, haha, since Margaret (our boss) says "that is how we do it in Africa!" It is probably more clean than using a latrine, so it was fine until a bunch of people walked by me...eekk!

Mubende was a cool place to see, especially because Lauren (another intern) and I decided that no muzungus had ever been there (instead of waving and yelling muzungu, most people just stared in awe at us. Some people even called Scarlet, an intern from China, Jackie Chan!!!). Mubende is apparently surrounded by 99 hills, so it is a really beautiful place. Our hotel was literally on top of a mountain, how beautiful! We got to visit a special tree, called Nakayima tree, that is a very sacred place in Ugandan culture. It was HUGE, and i may have been imagining things but I felt like it did actually possess something sacred. The tree trunk even looks like a face, and the roots are so big that you can walk in them like a room (each one is dedicated to a different god). We made a donation and prayed with an old woman who was the caretacker of the tree. It was a really cool experience, but it was sort of awkward because there were Ugandans who were actually on a pilgrimage to the tree while we were just sitting there taking pictures. Is that bad??

Anyway, the next day we went to the engagement ceremony, which was for Margaret's niece, Joan. The ceremony is supposed to be a formal introduction of the bride and groom to each other's parents, before the wedding a few months later (it ended up sort of being like a wedding reception in the US). The bride gets to pick one of her aunts to put on the ceremony, so Margaret was in charge of everything, and we got VIP treatment! In fact, we were actually in the ceremony....awesomely and sort of awkwardly. We wore traditional ugandan dresses called Gomesi, which are these dresses made of cool fabric with crazy pointed sleeves. It was cool to wear them, even though I probably looked incredibly strange, haha (the brides maids got to wear really cool strapless dresses, which Margaret said were the original Ugandan fashion until European missionaries came and told Ugandans they were too scandalous). We sat in the front row, and had to greet the grooms family when they came (in Luganda, of course). I think everyone thought it was a hoot! haha. I definitely had fun learning a little more luganda, except when I was walking and greeting the family and I hit my head on a jackfruit hanging from a tree...TWICE! everyone laughed:) We also got to parade out with the friends of the bride and dance to african music while everyone watched. oh goodness. They handed out "candy" to thank us for participating, but the candy actually ended up being cough drops...bahaha.

The rest of the ceremony was definitely interesting/ cool to watch, although it was in Luganda and INCREDIBLY long (like 9 hours, at least). During most of the time, the families just make jokes to each other back and forth, and then the grooms sister "looks" for the bride (pretending not to know who it is), and the bride's aunt "looks" for the groom. Then after they have been formally introduced, the grooms family brings a LOT of presents for the bride's family...sort of like a dowry I guess. The family lined up and carried in their gifts, which were all very practical things (like salt, cooking oil, some chickens, and a cow leg!!...which wast chilling in a bad with its hoof sticking out). Then we all danced the night away to African music under the stars..it was so cool!

It was such a good experience, and I cannot imagine what the wedding would be like if the engagement ceremony is so elaborate! But it also made me wonder about a couple of things...like can most people afford parties like that?? It made me realize that there are different socio-economic classes of Ugandans, even though sometimes it doesn't really look like it from the outside. Apparently engagement ceremonies are actually quite rare, because most people cannot afford them. It was sort of a weird feeling experiencing the more "upper class" side of Uganda for the weekend. While I was seeing that some Ugandans could live comfortable lives, I was getting more and more mad that most people couldn't. Whenever we drove through town and saw people who were obviosuly struggling to survive and feed/take care of their families, I would actually get mad...like almost pissed off. Like if a bus carrying a lot of people drove through town, all of the street vendors (even if they were like 60 years old) would literally sprint to the bus almost in desperation to try to make some money. But I still can't really articulate what or who I was mad at... i mean whose fault is it that so many people have to live in such utter poverty? Maybe instead of looking at it that way, we all need to realize that it is everyone's responsibility to help out in every way we can.

At the same time, I do have to remind myself that even if someone is poor in terms of money and resources, they still could be more satisfied emotionally, spiritually, and especially regarding relationships than the richest person in the United States could ever be. One evening I had a conversation with Raymond about how we really want all of the bad things in the world to change (and we want to help change them), but so much of the world's problems are insanely complex, and many times people think their interests conflict. And how are we supposed to change anything if true evil does really exist, and people continue to commit horrible atrocities against each other? It's almost too overwhelming to think about. Raymond and I both acknowledged that this kind of thing is what makes us wonder if any sort of god really exists.